Gia died clean and sober.
Rob Fay
Rob Fay and Gia came into each other’s lives at a time when they needed it the most.
A persons’ “Great Love” can sometimes be a friend.
Gia would be so proud of Rob today.
From the book “THING OF BEAUTY” by Stephen Fried:
End of May 1985, 25 year old Rob admitted himself into the Eagleville 30 day inpatient program. Gia had already been in Eagleville for four months.
Rob Fay: She was different from the other people I met there. She didn’t take any shit off nobody. If they were wrong, she had no problem standing up for what she believed in.
We had a love of Bowie in common. She had a lot of pictures of him and Angela, and some pictures her friends took on that movie set, I mean, we both were freaked out over him.
She told me right away that she was gay. She had a rough time with a lot of men in her life. There were times in NY when people just took advantage of her. I guess you wouldn’t really call it rape because she wasn’t screaming, but there were a lot of times when that happened when she didn’t want it to happen. But being as high as she was, you can’t argue, you don’t even know what planet you’re on. Something like that happens, it’s just ‘Oh well, it’s part of the scene’. She had been raped a few times. Date rape, or whatever you want to call it. She had a lot of anger about that.
A lot of things made her angry she was an angry person. She stuffed a lot of things down. Nobody took her seriously for a long time, because she was Gia, Gia like a china doll or something to a lot of people. Even at Eagleville, Gia was this fragile little thing. I said bullshit on this, that’s the thing they created for her, this little world where Gia was mommy’s girl.
Gia’s Mom, Kathleen, wasn’t allowed to visit, they only saw each other during therapy. During one session, Kathleen brought Gia a kite. It was bright yellow, Gia’s favorite color, and shaped like a butterfly. The therapist told Gia afterwards that she should give some thought to the life cycle of the butterfly.
I remember flying kites with her. I told her I really liked her kite. She said, ‘Oh yeah?’ and let go of the string. I asked her what she was doing. She said ‘I was just thinking about my mom. This is what I have to do with her. I gotta let her go’.
Rob Fay: Gia was upset that when Way died, nobody called her. All the people who claimed to be her friends. I think that when Way died, she realized that she wasn’t as important as she had come to think she was. I think that’s when se realized that a lot of it was bullshit and people who said they cared didn’t care. I think when he died, she also knew it was coming for her.
AUTHOR: After Eagleville, Gia was fully aware that her life was drawing to a close. That would make you think she ad to be filled with desperation, and hopeless. But that was not the case. Gia never gave up on her life or on her dreams. She never stopped being herself, just as she had always done, one of the aspects of her character that made her a star. She renewed her religious faith because, in those moments when we are tested, we can avoid the abyss only by seeking answers to the questions that every self-aware human being asks. We take stock of our lives, of what we’ve done, and what we’ve failed to do. In the midst of illness, some individuals evolve into new selves.
Gia left behind her days of partying and the social whirl, all of that seemed light years away! She knew what was important now: no longer the material mantra ‘time is money’, but rather ‘time is life’. As long as her strength held out, Gia refused to lock herself up in the house. Gia spent time with Rob Fay, Joe Petrellis and she saw Suzanne Rodier for the last time.
Rob Fay was permitted by Gia’s mom Kathleen, to see Gia in the hospital almost up until the end.
Gia was on a respirator her last month. She communicated by writing.
‘Gia wrote “I HOPE” when I asked her how she was feeling. Then she wrote “This nurse is sexy”, then scratched it out when her mom came into the room.’
~ Rob Fay
From the book “Born This Way” by Sacha Lanvin Baumann
Rob Fay: Gia did struggle with people’s reactions to her sexuality because it was difficult for everyone else to accept. I don’t think she had any problem exhibiting it, but people didn’t always take her relationships with women seriously. One of the most beautiful girls in the world was gay! I didn’t have a problem with it, but there was a lot of rejection … from mainstream society.
AUTHOR: Because of Gia and Elyssa Golden’s shared drug use, some people tried to diminish the bond between them by labeling it a “chemical romance”. Rob Fay couldn’t disagree more.
Rob Fay: Contrary to whatever anybody else seems to think, Elyssa was THE love of Gia’s life. Gia told me that. I met Elyssa a couple of times, and they were just as close as you can imagine. I got a very good vibe from Elyssa. She was very womanly, very friendly. They cared about each other.
Rob Fay: Eagleville Rehab was no stroll in the park. After our morning meetings and therapy groups, the patients had rec time. After the day was done, we’d go into the gymnasium. We’d play ping pong, volleyball… In those moments of distraction and relaxation, Fay and Gia began to open up to one another. She told me she’d been a model.
At one point Gia took me to her Mother’s house in Richboro, about thirty miles east of Eagleville. Gia didn’t have a key, and the two were forced to break in. Later, Gia’s mom said it was OK with the break-in. When I got into the living room, I saw the Vogue and Cosmo covers on the walls. That’s when I realized how much of a model she was. When we went upstairs to her room, she showed me a bunch of pictures. It was pretty cool, but she never really expanded on the whole experience. She talked about the parties, and it wasn’t exciting to me. I was more exited about my new life, being sober and trying to live the principles and values we were adopting in recovery. I’d been reborn.
We talked a lot about things that mattered, not money and stuff like that, but about helping other people and trying to get the best out of every day. She was generous in every way. She never really had any money, so that didn’t matter. We were just gonna survive.
During her final illness, she had incredible mental strength and an incredible faith in God. She knew life was difficult, especially for people with AIDS. She knew God had a plan for her…. She knew she’d be able to help people, and that’s exactly what she did. She wanted to help whoever she could reach, those young girls who thought all that crap in the magazines was real life. She wanted everybody else to feel the pain she’d been through.
AUTHOR: October 1986, Gia had little time left, but she used that time discussing with Rob what she could do to help others. including those who were dealing, as she had done with the hell of drug addiction. She made plan for a video about how she had come to recognize the damage her heroin addiction had caused. Her physical state continued to deteriorate, but she communicated with Rob until the point where her mind was no longer clear. The final thoughts she left him with are essentially hopeful ones: It is possible to escape from addiction. Better still is never to get involved with drugs in the first place. They don’t make life better, and they don’t solve problems the way many young people (though not only the young) hope they will. Gia passed away November 18, 1986.
Gia died clean and sober.
Rob Fay